Opens with various shots of our world which show that time is in a mess. Hmm
déjà vu… Still it does look good and we do get a funny interview with Charles
Dickens.
Winston Churchill
What has happened to time? Explain
it to me simply so that the audience and I can understand.
Doctor
Timey wimey.
Winston Churchill
No you can be more complex than
that.
We get flashbacks of the Doctor collecting more information on the
Silence.
Dalek
Hi.
Dalek
Just hi? No threats?
Doctor
I don’t want you to leave, we’ve
been off screen too long. Why?
Doctor
You get defeated too easily we
need to build the threat back up. Now shut up! I’ve come to yank information
out of your smashed defeated body.
*****
Doctor
Dorium you’re alive!
Dorium
Yes and I’m the only head who
could afford a comfortable box. Now you must be seeking the ultimate question?
Doctor
Be serious! We need that for the
anti climatic end to the episode.
We go back to the Utah
lake to watch the Doctor get killed.
Doctor
Can’t you walk out of the lake
quicker we’ve already had enough flash back scenes in the pre credit sequence.
River Song
Patience sweetie I’m going to
rewrite this fixed point in time.
Doctor
But that’s impossible... Probably…
I do seem to come up with a lot of rules that get are later broken.
*****
Doctor
Did you have to stun me?
Amy
What can I say? I like an
entrance! So what’s going on this time?
Doctor
All of history is happening at the
same time. Well the parts of history which we can recycle props for.
Amy
All at once? Shouldn’t the earth
be really overpopulated and deadly?
Doctor
Well…?
Amy
Shall we just go to the secret
plot advancing base?
Doctor
Yes please.
They go to area 52 which is inside a pyramid. This is a cool idea, it’s
a shame the set isn’t as grand as the special effects.
Captain Williams
The Silence are as quite as usual
Marm.
Amy
Good, good. Carry on Brad Pitt. I
mean Rory Williams.
River Song
Hello Doctor, do you want to do
the usual flirting.
Doctor
Sure for once we have plenty of
time.
Madame Kovarian
Oh no not the flirting. I should have
raised River better than this. Kill me please!
Amy
Ok.
Madame Kovarian
No I wasn’t being serious besides
that’s too dark for your character. Ahh!
Cut to the top of the pyramid where a distress signal is being sent
out.
Doctor
But whose going to help me. I know
the majority of people like me but who?
River Song
You must not die without knowing you are loved.
Doctor
Thanks for risking the world to
tell me that. Now before I die we’ll bind hands with my bow tie. Now Rory do
you consent?
Rory
How can I properly consent if I
don’t know what it is?
Doctor
Just do it! You too Amy.
Amy
Ok.
Doctor
That’s it River we are now husband
and wife.
River
That’s my wedding? But I didn’t get
a fancy dress, beautiful flowers, admiration from friends, a big party….
Doctor
No but it sure is a lot cheaper
this way.
They kiss and the doctor “dies” at last.
Amy
*Sob* The Doctor’s dead.
River Song
Oh mummy don’t be silly. There’s
plenty of life in the Dr Who series yet. I just killed a Teselecta version of
him. Now let’s all have some family time at last.
Audience
That’s a bit of a cheat and we’re
not talking about cheating time… We can’t wait to the Christmas special. Just,
no more disappointments please
Dorium
So you survived. But the first
question. The most important question in the Universe still remains. Doctor
Who? Dr Who?
Audience
You can not be serious!
Fin
