Opens on a very TOS
like planet. The nostalgia begins.
Keep her steady I’m about to jump into this erupting
volcano.
How is that logical Spock? There must be an easier way to
deliver the device?
Well yes, but think of the excitement Uhura.
Meanwhile Kirk and Dr
McCoy are running along the planets surface.
We’re out of sight let’s beam up.
We can’t we hid the ship underwater.
We have to stay undetected from the natives.
I’m pretty sure they haven’t invented telescopes yet Jim.
But I must admit the Enterprise
does look cool underwater.
I’m trapped Jim, protocol says that you should leave me here
to die.
Protocol also says that you should call me Captain, so I
don’t need you to lecture me. We’re coming to get you.
Cut to Earth and whoa
they’re in London,
they’re finally showing a future city that isn’t San Fransisco.
I can save your daughters life, just do me one little
favour.
You can save her life with just one vial of blood? Maybe
you’re not Khan then. He was a genetically enhanced human, not Jesus.
Hello Captain, Commander.
I don’t think that you’ve been taking your rank and
responsibilities seriously.
You lied in your Captains log. It’s a serious crime, we need
the audience to have absolute faith in the Captains Log so that we can deliver tons
of exposition.
I read Commander Spock’s log.
Don’t be surprised it is completely in character for him to
tell the truth. You have been relieved of command. You’re clearly too immature,
I don’t know why we didn’t realise this sooner,
I can’t believe that you think that I’m not ready for
Command… I’m going to get drunk.
Don’t get too drunk I’ll be calling you back as my first officer
soon. No disrespect Spock.
Later in a highly
exposed secret meeting room.
Admiral Marcus shows
an image that goes into unnecessary 3d.
This is the man we’re hunting.
For all our time travel adventures it sure is a good thing
that earth history isn’t studied at the academy. He’s nobody, honest, just some
nut called John Harrison. He’s highly intelligent.
Inteligent enough to attack our vulnerable meeting room?
Khan arrives in a
powerful looking gunship which has surprisingly weak weapons.
Hmm, shots from this phaser rifle don’t work I might as well
just chuck it into the engine.
Woah I can’t believe that worked.
How did he get to Kronos?
It is best not to ask such questions. The important thing is
that we have 72 missiles to kill him with.
Starfleet wants us to blow up all of Kronos?
Well no… I guess they just don’t trust our aim.
This is morally and legally wrong.
In this dumbed down new Trek we doubt they care.
Ok change of plan we’ll capture him.
They fly down to
Kronos and the Klingon patrols wait until they’re almost at the surface before
trying to stop them.
I’ll use my brilliant, never before seen piloting skills to
avoid them.
A minute later the
Klingon patrol descends on and traps them.
Your strategy suggested 2 dimensional thinking.
Thanks I will try to remember that.
It’s for a dramatic make up reveal that no one really cares
about.
So you guys have become the main villain again?
He kills the underused
Klingons and then surrenders to Kirk.
Cuff him and put him into the brig.
You’re not just going to lock me into some comfortable crew
quarters.
Why would I do something stupid like that? Who are you
anyway?
No need to shout. Just Khan.
Dr McCoy I need you to anakyse a missile with Dr Marcus.
Will I have time for some funny flirting too?
Please don’t you might make Kirk jealous.
There’s some kind of ship approaching.
Chekov is our warp drive back online?
No Keptin I’m wearing a red shirt I can’t risk dangerous
engineering work.
Hello Admiral that’s a massive ship, how did that get built
in secret?
Just hand over Khan Noonian Singh.
You’re not here to tow us? Fine we’ll warp to earth ourselves.
You could cause serious damage to your engine.
I’m sure it wont be anything a good kick can’t fix.
Sir, the Vengeance is catching us up!
Is that possible at Warp?
Sir it has always been possible.
The Enterprise gets attacked by the Vengeance
with some great damage effects shots. But then the Vengeance loses power.
Scotty? You’re on the Vengeance?
Ai Captain. This top secret ship doesn’t have security
measures.
You want my help to take the Vengeance?
Yes you helped to design it. For a ship made by someone from
the early 21st century it sure is powerful.
Diving through space in a space suit, how excitng, I bet
they’ll never see this coming.
Actually I’ve done this before, not so long ago.
Oh well it’s exciting for me.
Vengeance security
officer
Who are you? What are you doing here? How many questions do
I need to ask before your friends arrive?
Keep asking, we like our long action sequences. Star Trek has a budget
again, it’s exciting.
Weeee! Thanks for keeping the door open. Mr Scott shall we use
your overrides to cut off oxygen to the bridge?
I just said we’ve got a bigger budget now.
Ok let’s storm the bridge.
Hello I am calling just to confirm my own suspicions about
Khan.
I can’t always be your helpline, I’m not getting any younger
you know.
Come on I’ve been holding for ages.
Oh ok Khan is the most dangerous adversary we ever faced,
well besides the gods, but I doubt JJ
Abrahms will give you any of those.
Thank you, I will now proceed as I had planned to anyway.
Ha ha I love violence. Gak!
Good shot Scotty. Keep an eye him.
Will do Captain and I’ll keep an eye on him by standing
really really close. Ahh!
I’ll beam you back to your ship. Commander Spock drop the
shields so that I can beam over the missiles.
72 missiles in the
USS Vengeance hull
Why didn’t I just beam over the cryo tubes?
I laugh at your superior intellect.
The Enterprise loses power and starts falling to
earth.
I keep telling Sulu not to park so close to earth doesn’t he
know how to set a static orbit?
Come on we have to get the engines back online, thankfully
Khan beamed us near to them.
I’d sacrifice myself to fix it but I guess it’s a very
technical procedure.
Oh no it just need a swift kicking.
He’s in engineering stealing one of the best scenes your
character ever had.
You have been and always will be my friend.
Somehow I think this moment would be more significant if
this was a lifetime friendship. I mean I only met you a year ago.
Spock shouts a line
which a lot of the audience hate but deep down they longed to hear.
Beam me down I’m going to get Khan.
Are you sure you don’t want to take some red shirts, they
come in handy.
Would you like to help me Mr Scott?
Woah I’m sure glad my bones didn’t shatter when the ship
crashed. Being genetically enhanced sure makes life easy.
I am superior… I will run.
They have a long fight
scene across several flying vehicles before Uhura has the sense to give Spock some
backup.
Keep him alive, his blood can save Kirk’s life.
But he’ll never give consent to such treatment.
Let’s just skip the moral implications this time.
We are gathered to rechristen the USS Enterprise and remember all those who we lost,until I saved the day and learnt humility. Whilst being awesome.
Just get out of here kid.
Ok. Space the final frontier… This is so cool that I finally get
to say the lines.
Fin
This Work Is Not To Be Reproduced With Out Permission.
